I broke one of my own Facebook rules yesterday.
(Am I the only one who has to set up some boundaries for herself when it comes to navigating the Facebook stream?)
One of the rules I made for myself a few years ago is no politibooking. (I’ll save you the trip to Urban Dictionary by telling those who don’t know that politibooking is just what it sounds like – posting about politics on Facebook.) And you know, I’ve done a pretty good job of following that self-imposed rule. And yesterday’s infraction wasn’t even that serious – the article I linked to was quite neutral in nature. Not too inflammatory. Just a something to nibble on while you sip on your morning coffee kind of thing.
I opened my Facebook account in the summer of 2008. That also happened to be a time in my life when I was just beginning to emerge from the mentality that had long been the norm for me: Good Christians vote Republican. But now! But now I had been liberated from that belief and I was on fire! I posted provocative status updates, just spoiling for a fight. I shared links to HuffPo and dared someone to call me a liberal. I approached the conversation with all of the grace and subtlety of an angry bull at the rodeo, newly released from the chute.
And in the meantime, I did a piss-poor job of handling friendships.
(You can imagine.)
And, I don’t know. Yeah, my candidate won. Yeah, some good conversations came out of all of my politibooking. But I don’t know. It wasn’t too long before it was no fun.
It wasn’t too long after that when God started speaking to me (with actual grace and subtlety) about this pesky issue of unity in the Body of Christ and how maybe – maybe! – all of the politibooking was actually, uh, not promoting unity.
It would be one thing if I could engage the conversation in a relatively calm and invested way. But, no. No, I’m the kind to take out my righteous anger on a sinkful of dirty dishes, hurrying to the computer when I’m done so I can throw out a few more well-crafted points to prove my Rightness. I’m the kind to jot down notes as I drift off to sleep, statements I can add in the morning to really drive my point home.
“Listen,” I felt God tell me. “It’s not that I don’t want you to be passionate. Even Jesus freaked out and flipped some tables as a response to man’s unholy mixing of secular and sacred. It’s just that … well, maybe you might want to save your energy for Kingdom work?”
Just kidding. It was more like, “Hey Megan. Knock it off with that already.“
And so to hold myself accountable to honoring what my Father asked me to do when it comes to politics and Facebook, I filled in the “Political Views” part of my profile with “peacemaking.” That has become my own boundary for knowing if/how/when/what to do with politics in this medium. Is the ultimate goal of what I’m sharing to promote peace? If not, I don’t post it.
There are days when I think maybe I’ll have to take a Facebook sabbatical through the end of this year’s election season. And there are days like yesterday when I find myself breaking my own rules. And yet, there’s something redeeming about it for me. Knowing I acted like a jerk in the last political cycle makes me feel like I can prove – if to no one but myself – that I can listen to the promptings of the Holy Spirit as He gently corrects and encourages me to be thoughtful about what I share in the realm of politics.
Flipping tables is exhausting after awhile. Maybe instead I’ll stick to just giving them a little bump as I walk by.
image by Sean MacEntee
{ 28 comments… read them below or add one }
Love Love Love THIS! I believe that bumping tables might be akin to getting flies with honey…I also think about the verse that says not to be a stumbling block and how being SO political and SO adamant about it and SO unwilling to listen and critically analzye different views must surely be a stumbling block to others, right?
Love the idea of “peacemaking” as a political views description. Wonderful.
Me too! I’m actually going to go change my political status right now. You’ve started a revolution! But a peaceful one where we smile and hug and don’t really do any revolting. Mostly we’ll just sit around and knit or crochet and talk about stuff.
But yay for the peaceful revolution!
Megan,
Thanks for sharing this. I laughed at a lot of the similarities between us, our thought processes. Thank you for sharing these thoughts, and thank you for striving to be a peacemaker….we would all be better to do the same.
Kait
I love this. I’ve been a jerk in my day. At some point there are some posts I need to pull from my blog archive, if I can find the time to track them all down… I was WAY worse in 2004, when I was a firecracker seminarian!!
So…in 2004 I was a freshman at a Christian liberal arts college. I may have dressed up like Superman for election day, and my cape may have been a campaign banner from the Bush/Cheney team.
Yeah…
I have learned a LOT since then. I have landed politically in the middle (or in no man’s land somewhere off the spectrum), but the important thing is that I have learned not to be an idiot with how I share my opinions. This has helped not only in politics, but also my faith.
It seems like we go through a stage when we’re figuring out our belief system, whether politics, religion, or the best shows on TV, where we are overly confident that our opinions are RIGHT. We have been liberated! We see the light! We embrace the people who share the same beliefs and we’re incredulous over those that don’t. I don’t know what changes then- maybe a dose of cynicism? maybe after living some of these beliefs out for awhile? But I’ve found that self-righteous strain is tempered by love and grace and suddenly it’s more about conversation than being right. It can be so hard to put those emotions to the side but for us to move forward as a country, that’s what we must learn to do. I fervently hope that anything I post on FB or Twitter can promote good conversation and that we can walk away saying we agree to disagree and that we’ve learned from one another.
Great work, Megan. I’ll be sharing this one.
i’ve been on facebook for years but only just had my first disagreement there. i posted a link about bullying that i didn’t honesty expect to be so contentious, but it was. i’m glad for the conversation, and the topic was important enough to me to be worth getting into it a bit, but mostly i save provocative stuff for twitter or my own blog. it’s one thing to get heated in a comment section, but i have enough in my life that makes me feel at odds with the crowd–i don’t need to bait friends and family online:)
You mean, there are actually people who are *in favor* of bullying?
Love, love, love this one today. I too have changed much about the way I politic. I find that it is not so important to me to be right anymore. I like being calm. I like finding the peace. I like not being one that helps the storm along. Thank you for sharing this today. I just might need to change my status also.
Just this morning, I said to myself, “I don’t think I can handle another election year on Facebook.” Just this morning, I started writing on this exact topic, clumsily nosing around what you’ve stated so nicely. As a Unitarian Universalist, a religious liberal, and a social worker, I should always be invested in promoting unity … even when I read things (especially when I read things?) on Facebook that make my toes curl. Thanks for a lovely reminder to wage peace always.
Well said. I know I can do the same thing. It’s why I moved away from sites that encourage that behavior in me and forums. I just don’t see any benefit any more to arguing. Not much good ever comes from it. And one thing I have to remind myself of is that I am NOT Christ. Because Jesus did it, does that mean I should or am allowed to? I’m a broken human. Not the perfect Christ. And as elections get closer, it’s going to be harder to stay quiet. God still works even through the “wrong” candidates. If he can use a messed up girl like me and my life, surely He’s got this covered too… I have to remind myself of this often
Blessings,
Mel
Please feel free to stop by: Trailing After God
Really appreciate this, Megan. Just yesterday I, too, broke my no politicking on FB rule. AND I combined it with religion. I don’t know…just feeling frustrated.
I once had great hope that FB would be a forum in which people could have real political discussions–because they’d be talking with people they actually know, and would therefore be able to see them as people, not a label–but I’ve come to realize that the FB soundbite just isn’t conducive to real dialogue.
And can I tell you how much I appreciate a Christian with your perspective? I’m not a Christian (followed you here from Sorta Crunchy), but I am a huge fan of Jesus–the one I learned about who was a champion for social justice. I love people all across the political and religious spectrum; what they have in common is a desire for peace in the world. Thanks for the great suggestion for political views on FB. Think I’m stealing it, too.
Politics is such a touchy subject and so important too. I guess that’s what makes it touchy. Congratulations to you for trying to find a discussion ground.
grace-based relating, whether on politics or potty training. love it, megan.
I can so relate to this post. To the T of the way I was in the 2008 election and how I have been viewing this election year and Facebook use. The relationship that suffered in the 2008 election and little beyond was my father in laws. Not that there weren’t other issues but that one fueled the fire for sure. Eek.
Sigh. I am tempted to take a Facebook-sabbatical for election season, but for the opposite reason.
I must be the opposite of you, a mostly-conservative Christian whose friends are almost all extremely liberal (and usually unreligious if not anti-religious). (Sidenote: It also seems that being a conservative and a Christian means something completely different in Oklahoma than it does elsewhere, and I find that I don’t usually entirely agree with Oklahomans who are conservative and Christian, either. I say again: SIGH.)
Anyway, my point: I never post anything political on Facebook because I know most of my flist will not only disagree, but do so by shouting and name-calling.
None of these Facebook friends have a similar respect for my own sensibilities, though. Every little snippy link, strident status, cruel comic that pops up on my wall hurts, like it’s aimed directly at me. Which is not in any way rational, but when all you see piling up day after day is evidence that these people who are supposedly your friends not only think completely differently from you, but hate and disparage those who think like you…you start to think that they probably hate and disparage you, too. That you have to hide your own opinions and thoughts and beliefs because no one would like you if they knew who you really were.
So no matter how angry different issues make me, no matter what quips and arguments I can think to reply with, I can’t handle the confrontation and the hatemongering. I’ve regretted every instance of breaking that rule, because I never win in fights like those.
I just stay silent, and hate myself and everyone else a little more for it.
Having kept my mouth shut through many years of Moral Majority and Religious Right (because I SO disliked having my faith questioned and my shins — figuratively — kicked) it’s refreshing to hear some from those parties suggesting that they plan to keep their mouths shut for a while. Although you all seem to be youngsters, so you weren’t actually in on the shin-kicking. The Apostle Paul said that in this life we see inadequately, “as through a glass darkly,” and it’s good you’re willing to acknowledge it sooner than later. Because kicking in the dark bruises a lot of shins. And it doesn’t make many field goals. Best to you all.
Is it considered “politibooking” if I share this myself? I have friends on both sides of the Great Divide, and I often feel caught in the middle of a flame war.
So well said, Megan. The older I get, the more I tire of pompous passion from either side. Where is gentle disagreement? Civil discourse? Grace? Humility? They are sorely lacking – even in members of my own family, I’m sorry to say.
I tend to pass over politically inflammatory Facebook posts and pretend they didn’t happen, lest they taint my better views of the poster.
I like the “peacemaking” term, so much more freeing than committing to one party voice or another.
Slander and mud are all I see in the political world. I have been so deeply hurt by family members and their political opinions that it takes all I have to not drive by the polls on voting day. But slowly as I gain my composure in Him, I am able to vote in confidence. Just don’t ask who I voted for or I’m liable to unfriend you. And it seems to me Megan that you have been given a way to bump the table without knocking things over. Great job dear friend!
Nicely said, Megan. I often identify with your views so fervently, but I rarely comment. Not sure why. Maybe I’m just a little afraid to let go completely of my “rightness”…
Well said. I love this. It seems we disagree politically, but like you, I try to avoid politics on Facebook and on my blog. Because the message of Christ is so much more important, and I don’t want to cause divisions or turn others off to Him because of what direction I lean politically.
Great post!
My Facebook political view is “Jesus for President”. I had to make a rule for myself a little over a year ago to not engage in any FB (religious/political/combination of both) discussion with the potential to ignite unpleasant conflict, unless it was on MY wall, because I found myself out looking for a place to stir things up. Not healthy for me, not healthy for my friendships…just not healthy, period. However, if you bring it TO me & my Facebook page, game on!
Jesus for President pretty much changed my life.
Great post! I, too, try not to post a bunch of political stuff because it invokes the worst out of people…and most of the time they are my family! Ha! I honestly don’t like to talk about it much in real life, much less on Facebook. Christ most definitely wants us to be peacemakers. I’m looking forward to the day when Christ will reign on the earth.