Wonderful

by Dulce

We have had a couple of birthdays this week, which always prompts stories about their births.  With each of my four kidlets, before I ever took a pregnancy test, God spoke to my spirit during the night that I was pregnant.  I woke up with a song of joy and thanksgiving.  During my pregnancies, I could hear Him whisper things about the child inside of me.  After sharing some of the details, my seven year old gazed at me in awe.  “God really talked to you?  About ME?”  Yes, He did.  I proceeded to speak the words of truth that had burned into my heart about him and his sisters.  The faith that I already see growing in him, his older sister’s healing heart, the warrior spirit and contented laughter of the babies.

Then we pulled out the Bible together, piled on the couch like puppies, the little one watching Dora out of one corner of her eye and me out of the other, the middle’s elbows digging into her brother, and turned to the Psalms.  I didn’t play Mozart to them in the womb, but during some of the nights when I couldn’t sleep, I whispered Psalm 139 over them.   With the background noise of squabbles and a computer game that was left on and Boots and Dora’s dance music, we heard His promises to be with us no matter where or when.  I saw my daughter’s eyes glow at the beauty and reassurance of verse 9:

If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.

A couple who have had nightmares recently perked up their ears at the next lines:

If I say, “Surely the darkness will overwhelm me,
And the light around me will be night,”
Even the darkness is not dark to You,
And the night is as bright as the day.
Darkness and light are alike to You.

I kept reading:

For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.

Long ago, I memorized the entire Psalm in Spanish and English.  I have heard those words hundreds of times, but this time life sparked in them as I looked into the eyes of each kidlet and repeated them.  “Did you hear that?  The Bible says that you are wonderful.”  They smiled back with perfect assurance.  And my breath caught just a little, because some days I lack conviction on the part about “I know that full well”.  Not regarding them–never!  I see God’s fingerprints all over them, and delight in them just because they are my kids and some of the coolest, most lovable people I know.  But to “know full well” that I am wonderful?  Well, I keep coming across buried doubts about that somehow.

I snuggle up to my toddler–her hair still smells like the French toast she had for breakfast–and she gives me an enthusiastic and sticky smooch.  My four year old joins in with a tight squeeze.  “I lub you and I like you all day and all night.”  My eyes shut against the tears and I smile at their extravagant love, so generously given and received.  They know full well that we are all wonderful, too young and wise to qualify it with conditions or doubts.

As we play and giggle, I hear our Father echo bits of our conversation.  “You are wonderful.  I love you and I like you all day and all night.”  I let those words sink deep into my spirit, and smile back at Him.

Image credit: derPlau

16 Responses to “Wonderful”

  1. Diana Trautwein January 25, 2013 at 11:05 am #

    What a sweet picture, Dulce! Thanks for sharing it in this space.

    • Dulce January 26, 2013 at 10:54 am #

      Thank you so much! I am so grateful to have this place to write things down, both because I need to remember it and because of the life-giving community that you help create here.

  2. Ed January 25, 2013 at 12:55 pm #

    What a beautiful practice. I’ve been singing some “classic” worship songs to our son lately, and this encourages me to keep to it and to work in some more scripture reading as he grows up. What a delight to teach kids that God treasures them!

    • Dulce January 26, 2013 at 10:55 am #

      Thank you, Ed! I love to use songs, too. I think that my earliest memory is standing in a crib in Mexico listening to the Spanish version of the old Maranatha! tapes. Even now, hearing one of those songs brings back a sense of peace and beauty that soothes my spirit.

  3. kelliwoodford January 25, 2013 at 1:26 pm #

    Today i’m replaying old tapes. the kind you wish you could burn, ya know?
    well, they keep spinning – shaming me and naming me.
    and i believe what comes through your words here is just what i needed to play in response: Jesus Likes Me.

    not just ‘Jesus Loves Me,’ like a brother *has to* love his sister, but that He *likes* me. that He calls me wonderful and masterpiece.

    maybe i could begin to like me, too, if i borrow His glasses for awhile, eh? thanks for this truth, friend, illustrated so well.

    • Dulce January 26, 2013 at 10:57 am #

      Oh, Kelli, I know those old tapes so well! And you captured perfectly our need to know that He likes us, not as an obligation, but because He truly enjoys us! I hope you know how much I enjoy and appreciate you, lovely.

  4. the Blah Blah Blahger January 28, 2013 at 11:06 am #

    That just choked me up a little. What a beautiful story…and a beautiful Father who gives us scripture that is still blessing people today!

    • Dulce February 12, 2013 at 6:19 pm #

      Thank you! He really does give us beautiful words just when we need them. Daily bread.

  5. Natalie January 29, 2013 at 5:06 pm #

    Beautiful. Thank you for this.

    • Dulce February 12, 2013 at 6:20 pm #

      Thank you so much!

  6. Kreine February 1, 2013 at 6:46 am #

    I so needed this. Like you, I can easily see my children through God’s eyes, but myself? Not so much.

    As I glance around my cluttered home -stray toys, random kiddie socks, a pile of dirty dishes in the sink- I can almost silence my inner condemnation long enough to hear God whisper, “You are wonderful. I love you and I like you all day and all night.”

    • Dulce February 12, 2013 at 6:21 pm #

      Kreine, I join in with Him in repeating it. You are wonderful. You really are. And he likes you. Really likes you and enjoys you. And the thing that He likes most about you is that you are you!

  7. Robin Dance February 1, 2013 at 7:03 pm #

    These words easily become a recognizable picture. So…sweet….

    • Dulce February 12, 2013 at 6:22 pm #

      Thank you, Robin!

  8. Samuel Martin February 12, 2013 at 2:42 pm #

    Dulce,

    Your work is so powerful.

    The book of Psalms is one of my favorites. There is information in Psalms which illuminates so many other sections of Scripture.

    Very blessed.

    Samuel Martin
    Jerusalem Israel

    • Dulce February 12, 2013 at 6:24 pm #

      Thanks so much, Sam! He really does lavish grace upon grace. I think Psalms will always be my favorite book of the Bible because it is such an authentic outpouring of hearts, both ours and God’s.

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